The Secret Stump
On March 29, 2010, I gave birth to the most beautiful little girl in the world and officially became a Mommy. Our doctor cut her umbilical cord, cleaned her up, and handed her over. She was perfect. A few days later, Marc and I happily brought Arianna home to begin our new life as a family.
Motherhood came naturally to me. Arianna took to breastfeeding right away, I didn't mind the poopy diapers, and we all got to sleep for a few hours each night. There was one thing, however, that I wasn't so comfortable with - caring for the stump of her umbilical cord. It just looked so creepy to me...
Finally, one day, Arianna's umbilical stump came off! I was thrilled! So thrilled in fact that I decided to save it to show Marc. Knowing that the cat would probably get it if I left it out, I gently placed it in a drawer.
When Marc got home I showed him the little black and green stump. He thought it was disgusting and told me to throw it out. It was disgusting but I didn't throw it out. I should have, but I wasn't ready. Arianna was getting so big, and everyday she was becoming a little more independent. And this bug-like little mass was the last little thing that had connected her body to mine. I wasn't ready to toss it. So I put it in the back of the drawer and forgot about it.
Fast-forwarding to present day, Arianna is now 8 months old and is truly her own little person. Yesterday, Arianna and I decided to clean out her dresser to make room for new clothes she will surely be getting for Christmas. And there, in the back of one of the drawers, was the umbilical cord stump. Still disgusting, still buglike, and still in remarkably excellent condition.
I wanted to throw it out. I really did. But I kept it. I want to throw it out but now I feel bad. And scared. Thoughts like "Well, I've already kept it this long..." and "What if I throw it out and something bad happens?" I know - its crazy. I keep telling myself just throw it out! but then I can't bring myself to actually do it.
I know if I keep it, adult Arianna will be totally grossed out by it and think I'm a lunatic. But I don't want to keep it. Its gross. Its right up with those crazy people who keep their sons circumcised foreskins. I don't know what to do. Should I bury it? Throw it in the regular garbage? Set it on fire?
I should have let the friggin cat eat it.
Motherhood came naturally to me. Arianna took to breastfeeding right away, I didn't mind the poopy diapers, and we all got to sleep for a few hours each night. There was one thing, however, that I wasn't so comfortable with - caring for the stump of her umbilical cord. It just looked so creepy to me...
Finally, one day, Arianna's umbilical stump came off! I was thrilled! So thrilled in fact that I decided to save it to show Marc. Knowing that the cat would probably get it if I left it out, I gently placed it in a drawer.
When Marc got home I showed him the little black and green stump. He thought it was disgusting and told me to throw it out. It was disgusting but I didn't throw it out. I should have, but I wasn't ready. Arianna was getting so big, and everyday she was becoming a little more independent. And this bug-like little mass was the last little thing that had connected her body to mine. I wasn't ready to toss it. So I put it in the back of the drawer and forgot about it.
Fast-forwarding to present day, Arianna is now 8 months old and is truly her own little person. Yesterday, Arianna and I decided to clean out her dresser to make room for new clothes she will surely be getting for Christmas. And there, in the back of one of the drawers, was the umbilical cord stump. Still disgusting, still buglike, and still in remarkably excellent condition.
I wanted to throw it out. I really did. But I kept it. I want to throw it out but now I feel bad. And scared. Thoughts like "Well, I've already kept it this long..." and "What if I throw it out and something bad happens?" I know - its crazy. I keep telling myself just throw it out! but then I can't bring myself to actually do it.
I know if I keep it, adult Arianna will be totally grossed out by it and think I'm a lunatic. But I don't want to keep it. Its gross. Its right up with those crazy people who keep their sons circumcised foreskins. I don't know what to do. Should I bury it? Throw it in the regular garbage? Set it on fire?
I should have let the friggin cat eat it.
I can't believe you still have that! I remember being there one day and finding it in the drawer while helping change her diaper. Throw it out woman! You have many other (less disgusting, may I add) things to remember her birth and first year. First bib, take home outfit, you will save her first lock of hair and tooth, etc. You can do it, Arianna will apreciate you throwing it out!!!
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Knowing your family background as I do, your Pop-Pop would have saved it. Perhaps make a special shadow-box frame for it even.
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